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Bring out your dead

After a promising start to the year with the loss of both Shelley Winters and Wilson Pickett, the celebrity death event has been a little bit of a let down this year. With Gene Pitney being the only known name bothering to make the effort throughout the whole of spring and summer, it was left to Steve Irwin to romp home with this year's 'Celebrity Death Of The Year' title with his uniquely magnificent creation whilst out filming in Queensland's Great Barrier Reef.

Richard Hammmond's copycat attempt at getting himself mullered whilst filming was quite frankly, an embarrassment to the whole of England. Our latest offereing (some bloke off Talk Radio) has epitomised just how far down the celebrity death rankings we have slipped and following General Pinochet's demise we are even languishing behind such celebrity-less countries as Chile. Is it any wonder that the Aussies went on to wop us in the Ashes?

Organisers of 'Celebrity Death Of The Year' have expressed their disappointment at this year's turn-out and have blamed it on an attack of common sense breaking out but are confident that there will be a much stronger field next year. One high ranking official was quoted as saying 'it hasn't quite been the same since golfers stopped flying to tournaments'. Early favourites for this coming year include Baroness Thatcher, Pete Doherty and Richard Hammond (yeah right!). Betting is a little slow so far but officials are investigating a rather large wager placed in the Liverpool area on X Factor winner Leona Lewis by a punter known only as Ray.
posted by kwacky at 11:54 pm